Do you ever get frustrated that you’re the one cleaning the house?
When you do something nice for yourself, do you simultaneously beat yourself up for taking the time instead of working on a task for someone else?
When you and your significant other disagree about something, do you mentally run through a checklist of his or her faults and past non-loving behaviors?
A client named this chatter, “The itty bitty shitty committee.”
Who Makes Up This Committee?
They’re the voices in your mind who wind you up without ever giving you a positive outcome.
I’m not talking about a schizophrenic or psychotic episode that involves hallucination.
This is about the voices that are part of your everyday life—your second grade gym coach who told you that you’re a klutz, your mom fussing that men never help around the house, the fear that you’ll be abandoned or disliked if you do something for yourself instead of for someone else, your older sibling telling you that you’re stupid—those voices.
We all have them, but it’s up to you if you let your voices run your world or if you take charge and run it yourself. Because, frankly, sometimes those voices are lying to you.
What Is Mindfulness?
Mindfulness isn’t just about sitting in a quiet space, waiting for bliss and enlightenment to arrive. I know that everyone wants it to be like that, but it isn’t.
Mindfulness is becoming aware of what drives you and makes you ‘you.’ It’s taking responsibility for your thoughts, emotions, actions, and life.
And like it or not, it’s up to you to do the work that puts you in charge of your life.
Sure, you can let go and see where things take you. It’s your journey so it’s your choice. But that type of randomness seldom results in long-term happiness and abundance.
You’re also free to pursue the next stage of development by being mindful and steering your thoughts, emotions, and inner story to give you more of what you want in life. If that’s what you want, it’s up to you.
Does It Take Effort?
Of course! But it doesn’t take much effort. It’s a moment here and a moment there of becoming more aware of what’s happening in your mind and then deciding if you want that to continue or change. And if you want it to change, make a change.
Next time the voice of your second grade gym coach tells you that you can’t do something because you’re a klutz, it’s up to you to choose if you want to believe or not.
After all, you were only a kid. Maybe you’d have learned better coordination with a better coach. Maybe your body needed a bit more time. Maybe you need a good coach now to help you learn new movement patterns.
It’s your choice. What voice will you listen to? What part of your story will you keep and what will you rewrite?
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