Without realizing it, our connections to people often come through participation in each other’s stories or scripts.
If you have a fix-it personality, you tend to connect with individuals who create drama or take part in a victim approach to life – and vice versa.
If you live out a story filled with fears, you connect with people who enjoy playing the hero, villain, or another victim.
If your script is one of love, you tend to connect with others who run the same script or those wanting empathy.
Stories work best with multiple characters, so whatever your story is, you (unconsciously) look for other characters to complement it.
Is That Bad?
It isn’t good or bad.
Becoming aware of it is the important part. Once you’re aware, you can decide if the script you’re running is right for the character you want to be.
Knowing your script lets you examine it.
- Is it a story you consciously chose?
- Where did you learn to play the character if you didn’t pick it?
- What benefit do you get from playing your part?
- Does it help you lead the life you want or does it limit you?
- What happens if you try to stop the story? Can you?
- How do other people in your life respond if you stop your script and play a different role?
Choosing A Role
Although you can consciously decide to live a specific story, for most people, the things they see in their lives as problems are there because they aren’t fully themselves.
It’s like Dr. Seuss said, “Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
Being yourself is simple. The challenge lies in figuring out the parts that are the true ‘you’ instead of a story you’re living because someone else assigned that character to you, and then letting those unchosen parts fall away.
If you’d like more information about figuring out who “the real you” is, read this blog post. Click here: What It Takes to Be Unique and Successful