From dating to business, popular advice tells you that in order to be successful, you have to become someone who isn’t just another person in the crowd.
That’s the message society tells you.
But it’s wrong.
You don’t have to become something because you already ARE something.
Instead of trying to “become someone,” figure out who you are and then confidently be you. Something wonderful happens when you let all the pretense fall away.
- Your happiness goes up
- Your stress levels go down
- People are automatically drawn to you
It’s also a lot easier to let the things that aren’t ‘you’ slide away as you discover who you are instead of working (or straining) to become someone or something else.
Figuring Out Who You Are
There are several ways to discover or rediscover who you are. Everything from journaling to taking online personality quizzes can help, but I’m going to give you a few steps that will get to core of who you are quickly.
- Take some time to consider what makes you genuinely happy. Make a list for work, relationships, and in general.
- Think about and write down what you would do if you knew you couldn’t fail and if money were no object. Right now it doesn’t matter if you think you can achieve it, simply write down what you’d do and be if you had guaranteed success and unlimited money.
- Think about and write down what’s important to you. Family, friendship, integrity, making a difference, personal growth, work/life balance, etc.
- Write a personal elevator speech—if you only had 90 seconds to tell someone who you are and what’s important to you, what would you say?
It’s okay to take some time with these steps. You might be so used to the things you feel are expected of you, what someone else wants you to be or like, or what you’ve been doing that you’ve forgotten what you truly enjoy and want.
Once you have worked through the above steps, answer this question:
- What changes can I make right now to do more of the things that make me happy, reflect what is important to me, and bring me closer to what I want to do?
You don’t have to go from how things currently are to a totally different way of life. Simply start adding more of what matters and makes you happy in increments you know you can do.
Figuring out who you are is a process, and with different life experiences, you’ll change. The things that matter now may not have mattered when you were a kid or maybe they matter more. Either way is okay.
Be honest with yourself. Be brave enough to embrace who you are. Be YOU!